My Life

Adrian Brody

Is beautiful. Oh I love him.

Whoops

Got my mom mad because I made food while she was out. How dare I be hungry for food other than chips and grapes. I shouldn’t have made that rice since it ruined my appetite for the next week.

Bleh

I’m feeling so blah today. I really feel down for some reason. I want to see a therapist so badly. I think I have depression. It’s a struggle some days to even find enjoyment in things, and now I’m finding that I’m kind of numb sexually when I think about my boyfriend. I hope it’s just because I’ve had two periods this month, and whenever I get it, I occasionally feel down and uninterested. Last time I saw my boyfriend I would’ve felt like this because I got my period like the day after. This is just horrible and it needs to go away. I always turn into a jerk right before it, and I’m really feeling the moodiness this week. I hate admitting that my period effects my mood though, because then people use it as an excuse.

On a lighter note (pun intended ;D), I dyed my hair today and now it’s a little lighter, but it’s noticeable! The Clairol Textures & Tones hair color works so well. It doesn’t produce results like the box, but it really lightens dark hair. I used Honey Blonde and it came out a muted light brown, dark blonde. At least, that’s what it looks like in the poorly lit bathroom. I have to get another box tomorrow since my hair is thick and do underneath.

Disney!

Well, I’m planning to go to Disney World and I don’t even know if we can go yet. We’re just waiting on my Grandpa’s estate money to come in now I think. They should be on the final steps of it since the house’s sale just closed. It’s sad that everything he had and that he worked for is gone now. I am getting his car though. It’s just upsetting that we didn’t get anything more personal because my uncle took it all. I’m glad that I at least have letters from him still. I miss my Grandpa and I can’t believe it’s almost been a year since he’s passed away. That’s so crazy to me. This year has gone by so fast, but it’s probably been the most eventful year of my life. I went to senior prom with a date who ended up being my boyfriend of ten months now, I graduated high school, I worked, I deferred college for a year to figure out what I want to do, I read more, I watched more movies, I got all kinds of firsts in my relationship with my boyfriend, I went to the Cape, I turned eighteen. I’m sure there’s more, but that’s a lot. Now, I hope we can go to Disney World. I haven’t been on a vacation with my mom since I was about seven. I’d like to bring my boyfriend too, but if that doesn’t work out, I’m happy to go with my mom. I hope we can go.

Ugh

I hate when I tell something to my boyfriend that he doesn’t want to hear, and then he doesn’t say anything back. Like come on. He told me we were going to eat lunch today, and we didn’t because the other couple we were supposed to go with couldn’t go because the guy didn’t hear from the girl. And somehow that stops us from having plans?

EDIT: He apologized and asked me to hang out Saturday (the 26th), and he told me again then that he was sorry and explained what happened. It was supposed to be a triple date, but the third couple couldn’t make it, and my boyfriend’s friend told his girl that he would take her out at a different time. Apparently, on that different time, she told him that her and her brother import drugs from Britain to a storage facility in the US where they then sell them… oh, and she also drinks and does drugs. So, she’s done and he’s sad that he doesn’t have a girlfriend.